Lizards
by Shi-Kan
Summary: The Hyotei Regulars suddenly finds their locker room filled with lizards. It's up to Gakuto, Yuushi, and Shishido to save the day! Hyotei crack plus fictional manager, nya!


My 2nd Hyotei-crack story. I suck, lol. Hope you like it, nya!

**Lizards**

All: (walking into the locker room)

Gakuto: Damn, Atobe, you're ruthless!

Atobe: Ore-sama is not ruthless, but rather, beautiful. (flips hair)

Shishido: You know, none of your fangirls are here to 'kyaa kyaa' at you.

Jiroh: SUGEE!! Atobe flipped his hair!!

Atobe: Just as well. Ne, Kabaji?

Kabaji: Usu.

Shishido: ...

Oshitari: (pushing up his glasses) ..In any case, Atobe, Gakkun is right, it was a little harsh today.

Jiroh: I thought it was fun!

Atobe: Jiroh said it was fun. (smug) Who agrees?

All: ...

Atobe: Jiroh, you dare lie to me?

Jiroh: zZzZzZzZz...

Atobe: ...Well, 150 laps around the courts isn't too much, huh?

Kana: Are you an idiot? A normal kid is supposed to do **20**. Are you really a middle-schooler?

Atobe: Kana! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!

Kana: You told me to clean the locker room, but you came back early (again)!

Atobe: You're lieing!

Kana: Yeah.

All: (anime fall)

Atobe: Were you trying to be a peeping tom?! (grabbing digital camera from her hands) You're a peeping-Tom!

Kana: Wrong! Your fangirls pay great money for your pictures!

Atobe: What the he-- oh, you're right, they probably do.

Yuushi: (taking camera from Atobe's hands and going through the pictures) Kana, there are some of me in here, as well as Shishido and Hiyoshi...

Hiyoshi: (sfx: ping!) Na-nani...?

Shishido: Eh?! o/o

Yuushi: Slash that, there's some of all of us. Do you honestly sell these?

Shishido: (slightly relived/disappointed)

_**Note: Shi-Kan DOES have a meaning, nya!**_

Hiyoshi: _Gekokujyou..._

Kana: Nah, I keep those.

All: (anime fall)

Atobe: Kana! 200 laps around the court! NOW!

Kana: Yeah, you ARE an idiot! No way!!

Atobe: Who are you calling any idiot?!

Kana: You heard me!

Gakuto: Hey, let's not fight--

Atobe: SHUT UP!!

Gakuto: EXUSE ME? Who are you talking to?!

Atobe: SHUT UP!!

Gakuto: YOU SHUT UP!! YOU... YOU... ASS FACE!!

Atobe: (in shock... begins violently twitching)

_**Note: Apple Snapple wrote that in one of her stories for 100 Things I Will Not Do At Hyotei. Like, Atobe had some sort of twitching seizure... XDD credit for original idea! **_

Shishido: Looks like he's malfunctioning...

Chohtaro: Shishido-san, he's not a robot...

Gakuto: Yuushi, I dare you to poke him.

Atobe: (seizure-like twitching stage: begin!)

Yuushi: (puts on rubber gloves) It's best not to get contaminated in this sort of situation. (pokes Atobe)

Atobe: (faints in Kabaji's arms)

Kabaji: Usu.

??: (girlie scream)

Shishido: Eh!? Is there another girl in here??

Kana: Not on your life, sport! (running over towards scream)

Hiyoshi: (backed into corner, still screaming and shakily pointing towards mysterious figure)

Gakuto: IT'S A GHOST!!

Kana and Chohtaro: (jumping on top of lockers)

Chohtaro: Kill it, kill it!

Shishido: H-how are you supposed to kill a--

Gakuto: PUT IT TO SPIRITUAL SLEEP!!

Kana: How do you know that?!

Gakuto: I've watched enough shonen to know this!! Yuushi, Shishido! Quick!

Yuushi and Shishido: 'Quick' ...?

_Yuushi, Shishido, and Gakuto suddenly find themselves in Ghost Buster uniforms, along with vacuum cleaners._

Shishido: What the hell?!

Kana: Hey, wait...

Gakuto: Quickly! Advice??

Kana: (jumping down and picking up the 'ghost') This isn't a ghost...

Chohtaro: Bwaaah! It's a lizard! TT.TT (still on top of the lockers)

Gakuto: But we're already in costume... hey, Yuushi, Shishido, let's sing our theme song!

Yuushi: Oh, Gakuto, but it's so...

Gakuto: HOP! STEP! JUMP! DREW! DRAW! DRAWN!

Shishido: _Lame..._

_**Note: 'Kokoro no Tamago' is a great song! Don't listen to Shi-san!**_

_Fwoosh... smoke coming from other side of room_

Hiyoshi: Don't tell me the locker room is being burned down--

Gakuto: DID THE GHOSTS MULTIPLY?!

Shishido: THEY'RE LIZARDS!!

Chohtaro: That's--

Kana: A giant AquaPod with Atobe's face on it?!

Yuushi: Rather, an Escape pod. With Atobe's face on it.

Atobe: (suddenly wide awake) Ore-sama ni bigi ni yoi na!

Jiroh: (suddenly waking up from where he was laying on the floor) SUGEE!! (falling back to sleep)

_And so Atobe and Kabaji go off in their Aqua-- er, Escape pod, bursting a hole through the ceiling and causing Taki, who hasn't said much, to open the front door and make a run for it._

Taki: I'm transferring to St. Rudolph...!!

_Vroom!_

Chohtaro: A motter-cycle AND lizards?! WAAAH

Kana: Choh-chan, it's just that vacuum cleaner... SHUT THE DAMN THING OFF, GAKUTO!

Gakuto: (swooping lizards into the vacuum cleaner and the lizards are all 'Dx') MUAHAHAHA! TAKE THAT, GHOSTS! THE GHOST BUSTERS ARE HERE TO GET YOU!

Yuushi: (getting into it) I AIN'T AFRAID OF NO GHOSTS!

Shishido: Not you too!!

Chohtaro: Akatugawa-senpai, you're smart! What do you think we should do?!

Jiroh: zZzZzZzZz...

Chohtaro: WAAAH!!

_**Note: Gomen, super uke Chohtaro is my favorite ;.;**_

Shishido: (taking out bottle of aspirins and water bottle... proceeds to put all the pills in his mouth and gulps it down with water... and finally, he passes out.)

Kana: (poking the passed-out Shishido) Hey there buddy, you okay...?

Shishido: (twitch)

_Okay, so, Jiroh is sleeping in the middle of the floor, Chohtaro is like all crouched up on top of a locker, Kana is poking a passed-out-twitching Shishido, there's a giant hole in the ceiling from where Atobe and Kabaji escaped, Hiyoshi is trembling in the corner, and Gakuto and Yuushi are saying singing Kokoro no Tamago and/or yelling catch phrases from Ghost Busters. _

_If I don't end it here, I have a feeling I'll end up ending it with Hiyoshi setting the locker room on fire and everyone scrambling for their lives, so, eh, let's end it here. XD_

_And so ends another regular day for the Hyotei Regulars!_


End file.
